Dell and his mother.

From left to right, Mrs. Silk, Dell, Delight.

I have been fortunate to have known some amazing people during my life, but in my mind, Mrs. Silk is at the top of that list.  Although she is gone now, her resume of accomplishments would easily put most of us to shame.  Not that she would ever flaunt them; she was humble about her position and saw herself only as one trying to keep her family together.  That was it though, she did all she could to ease the burden of those she loved and installed within each of them the need to care for family.

It was that love of her children that drove her on, facing each day with the determination to do what she could with what strength she had.  I will not go into specifics, but suffice it to say that she overcame obstacles which would have crippled most of us.  And the wonderful thing about it was that she was never bitter.  In spite of the hand she was dealt, it was her greatest desire to make things better for others.  She installed these qualities in her children.  Love your family and do what you can to help them through each day.

The number of people who, at any one time, were in the Silk household was staggering.  There were her children and the children of her children.  To many it was "Grandma's place" and it represented a place of support, protection, love, and fun.  There was always someone to talk to, someone to play with, and someone to share your troubles with.  Life went on for each one, but always under the watchful eye of Mrs. Silk.  Her door, like her heart, was open.  You were always welcome home.

Dell loved his mom although you wouldn't hear him say that in so many words.  He called her "Old Bird" or something to that effect, probably in reference to her being such a mother hen to those shuffling around her.  He had enormous respect for her, again not that you would hear him say that.  But you could tell by his actions.  He was there whenever she needed something and never complained about it or minimized her need. 

There is the story of Dell being followed home by a group of young men who wanted to do him harm.  Mrs. Silk, being who she was, knew the solution was not to protect her son from the problem but rather to face it in a fair manner.  She somehow orchestrated it that Dell would face each person, one on one, outside the house.  I can imagine her thinking that the problem would not go away unless the conflict could somehow be resolved.  Dell was never one to back away, and it allowed everyone involved to express themselves.  Dell took each one on, one at a time, and defeated them all.  I can't speak to how bruised everyone was after the ordeal, but I am sure more than one ego left there with a black eye or two.

Dell has always had a challenge with his intensity.  He could be described as angry, manic, depressed, devoted, hard working, and encouraging.  In all the years I knew Dell, I never saw a sign of weakness or sadness, until I attended his mother's funeral.  During the service, speaking at the mike, he broke down and cried - sobbed really - for the loss of one he loved so much.  Although he teased her and made loving fun of her, he was completely devoted to her and probably respected her more than any other person on earth.  He knew all that she had been through, knew the difference she had made to so many others, and knew the things she had sacrificed to be the example to her children she knew they needed.  He loved her, missed her, and was in great sorrow for the huge hole that was now left in his heart.

The wonderful thing in this story though isn't of its end with her death but rather how her life influenced him.  Dell was faithful to family and supported and encouraged them any way he could.  I do not believe that Dell's personality would have naturally carried him down that path.  No, it was his duty to love family as his mom had and to do everything he could to help them along.  Her legacy became his legacy, for we all know about Dell's commitment to family.  She ended up being the best teacher he ever had.

Thanks for reading.   www.ericspix.com   Eric Svendsen

The fact that I was an outsider and did not deserve a place in her heart, she opened the door to me and allowed me to peer into the world that she struggled so hard to assist.